Yup that was me yesterday, dug myself right into it. Let me start by saying the kids had a great day and got lots of nice gifts! Sarah loved her Eyeclops and Littlest Pet shop toys and her video camera. Travis LOVES his X-box 360 and played most of the day.
I called my friend/boyfriend Dave around 8 and he informed me that everyone was coming around 12. I said good I can be over then. He then told me to "hold off" until about 1:30 so they could unwrap gifts first. I said a little sarcastically "sure I know I'm not family". I hung up and got pretty upset. I felt like I was "not good enough" or not important enough to join with them in unwrapping gifts. I stewed and cried and then called him up and yelled at him that he really hurt my feelings etc... I was really mad by then. After all I had been with him on again off again for over a year and attended all the other family functions, I felt rejected. I told him I would come over at the "appointed" time. So I got Sarah ready to go to her Grandma's and I decided to go geocaching. I should never have gone to the first two I went to. I had to break snow through a field for about 1/4 mile. It was very strenuous. Then after I found that cache, I went on to try and find the next. I ended up going under the road bridge and was exhausted. I climbed up the snowbank which was very steep and got onto the road and walked back to my car. I will go back in the spring for the second one. I drove up the highway to the Wal-mart thinking they would be open. They weren't. So I went north to another geocache. Where I parked said it was .54 miles away. So I hiked in. The trails were well packed down and I found it after about an hour. My right leg was really hurting from the groin to the knee with each step. I must of strained something. After I found the cache, instead of backtracking, because I had taken some shortcuts through the woods, I followed the nearest trail out to the road. Turns out I was on a road about 1/2 mile or more from my car as the bird flies. On foot on the road about 3-4. I was exhausted and though I would hitch a ride. Who picked me up is another story for another day! It turned out to be a very strange coincedence! So I went back home got the gifts ready to bring to Dave's. I was warmly greeted but still felt like I didn't belong anymore. I talked to Dave privately and he said it was his Mother's idea because we were "off and on again". I guess I can see their point, but now it will be off again and permanately. I tried to cuddle up to Dave but nothing was reciprocated, more like tolerated I think. I think alot of it was my fault too, because of my situation I think I used Dave because he was convenient and his family was nice to me. I don't see any future there. He is too attached to living with his parents and has views and opinions I don't like. I think next year, I will make Christmas here with the kids and let it be that. I am tired of having to wait to be invited to someone's house and feeling like a moocher.
I'm sorry this turned into another negative entry. I just had to get it off my chest.